I’ve fallen a victim to the BSNS Syndrome- the siren lure of the Bright Shiny New Story.
I feel like a drug addict trying to come up with excuses for my next fix. The truth is, I just can’t feel excited about what I’ve been trying to work on.
That’s the problem, I don’t want a story I have to work on, I want a story I can play with, have fun with, enjoy writing, not feel like “This is a chore but it’s got to be done” every time I sit down to write. Is that a realistic expectation? I know that not many stories would ever get finished if the writer didn’t keep going when the going got tough. I don’t want to be a serial starter, never getting anything finished.
Though that’s a damn good strategy for a writer with a massive fear of rejection. Just keep moving from unfinished story to unfinished story. Nothing ever gets submitted because nothing is ever finished, so nothing can get rejected. NIce and safe and comfortable. The no-risk method of feeling like I’m doing something to achive my dreams, without ever actually having to put myself out there. So I tell myself I have to stick with the Work in Progress, keep slogging on.
But the problem is, I’m so bored bored bored with the WiP, I feel like I will scream if I have to add another word to it. I didn’t choose this story because I loved the story and wanted to write about the characters. I chose it for all the wrong reasons, because I though it was the best fit for Modern Heat of the stories I had in mind and I wanted to enter the Feel the Heat contest. And it was the idea that appealed the most to my writing buddies who are also aiming at MH.
But it wasn’t the story I most wanted to write. The story I most wanted to write was this crazy mixed up thing set in an imaginary Eastern European country with a kidnapping and a forced marriage and all sorts of weird and wonderful things. Which I rejected because I thought “No, that’s too weird and wonderful for Mills and Boon. They won’t buy that.” So I settled for the safe boring story set in London with the usual billionaire hero and I’m bored bored bored and can’t write a word of it becauase it’s not really my story, it’s the story I think I should (horrible word!) be writing.
The story I want to write now is even more far fetched than the original idea I dismissed as too off the wall, though it does include a lot of the same ideas. And it feels like a story I could havea lot of fun writing. It feels like characters I could love. It feels like even if it gets an immediate big fat R from the editors in Richmond I won’t care because the story will have been the point of it all. It feels like a Good Thing.
So I’m going for it.
If I am whinging in a couple of weeks about being bored with the new story too, the people who said I should have stuck to the WiP have full permission to say “I told you so.”
But if I am still loving the story and the characters and powering on with my word count maybe, just maybe, I can silently whisper to myself “Yes, oh yes!”